this attempting to write in a certain way is not working out very well. this is a time of austerity, the time for decultivating certain habits, and not a very good time to be playful and free and funny. also, yesterday, in a fit of the blues, i crumbled and headed to crepe heaven and consumed two crepes and a hot chocolate and a  very rich, very moist, dark chocolate and apricot cake. i drew out the process of consuming the cake for as long as i could, taking tiny bites and letting it swirl around my tastebuds and distracting me very thoroughly from said blues. i like relishing food. food that is meant to be consumed hot just doesn't cut it. halfway through my relishing it, the tastes disappear and become less appealing and one could pretty much be eating soggy cereal instead and there'd be no difference in one's enjoyment of the meal. i think the only other activity i relish in this way is swimming. so new project: relish more than just food.